• Kay & Shi

The Daily Scroll: A Mentorship Recap - June 29th, 2021 Show Notes

Kay:

Hey there, Questers hope you're having a terrific Tuesday. It's June 29th and this is episode 387. Today's quote was submitted by a fellow Quester, Miss Lisa Slack. It's one of her very favorite quotes from one of her very favorite mentors, the one and only Les Brown.


Shi:

Well, Les tells us, "Someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality." And we are big fans of Les. That is just such a solid quote that can really add a lot of dimension and value to your life. But Lisa Slack has added a lot of value and dimension to us within the John Maxwell Team and we just have to take a minute to say how much we appreciate her and love her. Lisa, you are a gem of a human being and we're so glad that you brought forward this powerful quote today.

Kay:

Lisa Slack from La Mirada. We love you, Lisa. So glad to have you in our circle and thank you so much for submitting this amazing quote. This quote, I got goosebumps when you were reading it, Shi. So incredibly powerful. When he's talking about someone else's opinion of you not becoming your own reality, how easy is it to listen to what someone else's ideas and thoughts are and start buying into them as your own. Now, it can be easy to do that if somebody is trying to present a business idea or someone's working on a project or they're trying to get something through within your family or something like that. So, this isn't somebody's necessarily manipulating, but we listen to people's opinions all the time and we especially listen when they're about us, and sometimes we even change to reflect that.


Shi:

We do and when we're not standing guard at the gates of our mind and at the gates of our identity, we can become more of a reflection of other people's opinions rather than the manifestation of what it is that we desire to become and who the character is we hope to craft within the masterpiece of our own lives. So, bringing it back to this ability to stand guard, and to realize that you are able to shape that reality of your identity from within, from internally and that you are the one ultimately in control, you have your hands on the wheel. Sometimes we forget that and someone really influential in our lives has an encounter or says something that might just make you question who you are. Maybe it's just one comment. “Oh, you really think you can achieve all that?” And all of a sudden you start questioning, “Can I achieve this? Am I worthy? Do I really trust this person?” And all of a sudden, your reality reflects that opinion, which before you didn't.


Kay:

It can be as simple as a one-liner or a passing comment. It doesn't even have to be something that is like Shila said, the big, scary opinion that comes and slaps you in your face. But how often do we hold ourselves back? Sometimes even because of those one-line comments or even because we're just so afraid of those one-line comments that we don't want to go out and get them in the first place and hold ourselves back from any kind of success because we're so afraid of what others’ opinions will look like. I mean, just take, for example, if you've ever made a change in your life and let's say like a weight-loss change, you're going to change your diet and then you go out to eat with friends that you've been going out to eat with for a long time and you normally all share French fries together. This one time, you go out with them, you're now on a diet and you say, “I don't want to share those French fries. No, thank you,” and they start saying, “What? You don't want to have fries?”


Shi:

You're too good for us now?


Kay:

“Too good for us now. What's this about?” So, you eat the French fries, and you backslide on your diet, and you fall back into the pattern and before you know it, you're right back in the space that you were before because you allowed someone else's opinion of what you had going on to influence your behavior.


Shi:

Here's one we see often that's very detrimental. A past opinion, maybe you weren't lucky like where you were, and you didn't have two incredibly supportive, loving parents. Maybe you are one of the many, many people out there who had parents who said negative things to them, or who told them you won't amount to anything. We see and encounter so many people who keep those past judgments and statements and internalize them and allow them to become their reality. We really like in "The Work" by Byron Katie, that she talks about how maybe a person said something negative one time, but how many times do you replay it in your head? What we know is: what we think about, we bring about. So, if we continue to think about those poor opinions, we bring about that identity that we're not proud of, and then we just have a self-fulfilling prophecy loop that doesn't do anybody any good.


Kay:

Well, that really is allowing someone else's opinion to become your reality because they said it to you once and you've now said it to yourself hundreds of times in the in-between. So, like Les Brown reminds us, "Someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality."


Shi:

Alright, that brings us to your quest and today it's a Reality Quest. Today we want you to take two minutes to express positive opinions of yourself either written or verbally to yourself in the mirror, just not in your head. Either written down on a piece of paper or verbally out loud to yourself Two minutes to express those positive opinions so that you can create a better reality for yourself. Are you ready? You can chime in here..


Kay & Shi:

Let's quest!