Kay:
Welcome, Questers! It’s Friday, August 14th, and this is Episode 160. Today, we have a quote for you from a little bit of an unconventional source, and that is the hand stitched sign in your grandma’s hallway, that reads, “Home is where the heart is.”
Shi:
Classic advice from a classic place in everyone’s memory! And, maybe you don’t have the quintessential, hand-stitched sign in grandma’s hallway, but you’ve certainly heard this phrase before, “Home is where the heart is.” And actually, when we first had a quote planned for today, it was something really long, and deep, and about like finding belonging where you feel connected. And then, we realized, “Oh, the message is: home is where your heart is!”
Kay:
And so, we decided to shift the quote into something a little bit simpler. But, we’re going to take a little bit of an unconventional twist on this unconventional source, today! Because, a lot of us think about home is where the heart is, and we think that means that my heart is with my family, or my heart is with my loved ones. And so, that means that’s where my home is too! But, we’re going to take a little bit of a twist here and talk about how wherever your physical heart is, (AKA: wherever YOU are), you are home!
Shi:
Well, everything you need is already right inside of you. And, if you can be comfortable in your own skin – if you can love where you are and who you are at that very moment – that’s physically where you are, which means that IS home! And, if you can cultivate that sense of self within yourself, then it really doesn’t matter where your physical body moves around, because you’ve always got that flame of home right inside.
Kay:
Now, that might feel like an impossible task to achieve. And, we’re not saying that every single moment of your life, you’re like, “I feel like I belong!”
Shi:
“I’m the flickering flame of home and belonging!”
Kay:
“My heart is just ALWAYS warm!”
Shi:
…I’ve got a cold heart sometimes!
Kay & Shi:
*(Laughter)*
Kay:
Right?! So, one of the things that I do, to help foster my own sense of belonging, is to remind myself often – (especially when things aren’t going right!) – that no matter where I am, I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. Because, if I wasn’t there, then I wouldn’t be! Like, if it’s really down to reality, wherever you are is exactly where you’re supposed to be, because that’s what’s real!
Shi:
What I love too, is that alternatively, if you are off track, you can ask yourself, “Where’s my heart…Where’s my heart in this?” And, “Where is my heart telling me to go?” And, let it be more of a leader in you so that it can take you to that place of belonging, where you feel like you are where you’re supposed to be. And, right now, obviously you are physically where you’re supposed to be, cause you’re there! But, to also be more intentional with that by asking your heart, “Where is it that I should be headed so that I can feel even more belonging and at home?” can really help guide that sense as well!
Kay:
You know, I was feeling really squirrely on Sunday of this week. I was just feeling anxious. And, I had a bit of a flare up on my back and I had an upcoming pageant, and so I was just feeling a little bit stressed out about that. And, I was starting to just feel like things are wrong…”I’m wrong, this is wrong, the situation’s wrong”…And so, I dropped down into my heart and I said, “Well, what would be right?…What could foster that sense of belonging?” And, I actually ended up taking a salt detox bath, which helped totally calm down what was going on on my back, and really helped to relax me. And, it just felt good to take a bath and do something for myself, which also really helped to foster that intentional feeling of, “I am where I’m meant to be!”
Shi:
What’s interesting is that we’ve always asked ourselves, “What does this meaning of home mean?” And, we’ve studied this a lot within our restaurant company, because when we surveyed our guests by the thousands, the number one phrase that comes up is, “it feels like home.” So, we’ve really unpacked that, and asked ourselves, “What does home mean?” And, what we’ve come to understand, certainly in the sense of our restaurant, and inside of this quote, is that home is where you feel safe – both physically and emotionally – safe in your communications, and in your economics. And so, we think home really comes down to this sense of certainty and safety, (not certain that everything’s gonna stay the same and nothing’s going to change!), but the fact that you’re protected at the basic level in all of those basic ways. And so, when we think about home, (AKA: safety) being where the heart is, it really is about listening to that heart and letting it guide you more often, so you can feel that sense of safety more often as well!
Kay:
Well, and you can create a better sense of safety for yourself by being intentional about guarding your thoughts, and understanding that if you start to bash yourself – or your life – or your circumstances – or your inhabits of negative thinking – that can really color your experience and end up causing you a lot of suffering. So, just a good reminder here on this quote, that comes from such an unconventional source – (that hand stitched sign in grandma’s hallway!)…
Shi:
…That says, “Home is where your heart is.” And, that, of course, today brings us to today’s quest!
Kay:
All right, guys! So – it’s a feeling quest here on this feel good #FriYAY! And, we want you to take 60 seconds to think about the things that you need in order to feel that sense of belonging inside of you. No matter where you are, once you know what forges that feeling, you can go about finding more of it for yourself! Are you ready?
Kay & Shi:
Let’s quest!
Shi:
Have a great weekend!
